How This Recovering Peacekeeper and Utility Player Became Known as the Powerful Harmony Hero
We were sitting at my kitchen table, three strong-willed women in the middle of a heated discussion. Two of them were quite riled up, voices rising, emotions escalating. I sat there, listening to them state their cases while one became increasingly emotional.
Then something shifted inside me.
I paused the conversation. I began to speak to them both in a way that let them know they were truly being heard. I offered a solution that would benefit everyone involved. In that moment, my identity was forever changed.
As one of the ladies was leaving my house, she turned back with a knowing smile and said, “Goodbye, Switzerland.”
A new era was born for me that day. To this day, she still calls me Switzerland.
The Paradox of Switzerland
Here’s what’s fascinating about that nickname: Switzerland is a neutral country that cannot engage in war efforts. But the very nature of peacemaking requires that you get into the middle of the conflict and find a positive outcome for all involved.
There’s a profound difference between neutrality and peacemaking. Neutrality stays on the sidelines. Peacemaking steps into the center with intention and skill.
For many years, I’ve worn the spirit behind that name and applied what I’ve learned about the difference between peacekeeping and peacemaking in my relationships at work, at home, and everywhere I go. This distinction has become the foundation of everything I teach about authentic leadership.
From People Pleaser to Peacemaker: The Transformation
So how did a former people pleaser change her stripes to become known as a peacemaker? The answer is simple, but not easy.
Understanding My Real Worth
I was once told that 95% of what anyone does can be done by someone else, so you need to understand the 5% that sets you apart from everyone else on the planet.
For me, that 5% centered around my love for words and colors, creativity and leading others. These became the catalyst for discovering my authentic power. But first, I had to confront an uncomfortable truth about my leadership style.
Most of my life, I tried to keep the peace by bending over backwards to make someone else happy—often at the expense of my own happiness and effectiveness. This isn’t healthy leadership. It’s not even real peace. It’s just postponed conflict wrapped in exhaustion.
The Wake-Up Call
The turning point came at a work kickoff meeting during a team-building exercise. I’m incredibly competitive, so I was fully engaged when we received our DISC profile assessments. I found myself on a team full of “D” personalities, and I’m a high “I.”
We were struggling to complete the task at hand. Everyone had a different approach, and they were arguing instead of collaborating. Sound familiar?
In that moment, I had a choice: fall back into my old pattern of peacekeeping by trying to smooth things over and make everyone comfortable or step into something entirely different.
I chose differently.
Collecting the Tools for My Leadership Utility Knife
What happened next was years of intentional skill-building. I began collecting the tools that would transform me from a background utility player into what I now call a Harmony Hero.
I learned that your presence is your power, and your calm is your competitive edge. But this isn’t about being passive or neutral. It’s about developing the inner stability that allows you to step into chaos and create meaningful resonance.
I discovered the difference between:
- Peacekeeping (avoiding conflict at all costs) and Peacemaking (engaging conflict to create win-win solutions)
- Being neutral (staying uninvolved) and Being centered (engaging from a place of inner strength)
- Utility playing (doing whatever needs to be done) and Orchestrating harmony (bringing out the best in everyone)
Practicing the Skills to Become a Joyful and Empowering Leader
The transformation wasn’t instant. It required consistent practice and a fundamental shift in how I viewed my role as a leader.
I no longer felt the need to keep the peace at any cost. Instead, I became willing to get into the middle of difficult circumstances to find a way for all parties to win. This meant developing skills I had not prioritized before:
Active listening that goes beyond hearing words to understanding underlying needs and concerns.
Emotional regulation that allows me to stay calm and centered even when others are activated.
Creative problem-solving that finds solutions others might miss because they’re too focused on being right.
Authentic communication that speaks truth with compassion and clarity.
Conflict transformation that sees disagreement as an opportunity for innovation rather than a threat to avoid.
The Five Moves That Redefined My Influence
Through years of practice and refinement, I discovered that leadership transformation happens through five specific moves that shift you from background player to maestro of change:
- Finding your authentic center instead of trying to be all things to all people
- Creating meaningful resonance rather than just managing reactions
- Engaging with intention instead of simply responding to whatever’s loudest
- Building bridges that connect different perspectives into innovative solutions
- Sustaining your presence through practices that protect your inner peace
These moves don’t require you to become someone you’re not. They require you to become more of who you authentically are without losing your calm, compassionate core.
From Switzerland to Harmony Hero
Today, I’m no longer just “Switzerland”—the neutral observer who helps others find peace. I’ve evolved into what I call a Harmony Hero: someone who steps into complexity with both courage and compassion, creating outcomes that seemed impossible before.
The difference is profound:
Switzerland stays neutral and facilitates from the sidelines. The Harmony Hero engages fully while maintaining inner peace, transforming conflict into collaboration.
Switzerland helps others find solutions. The Harmony Hero creates new possibilities that didn’t exist before.
Switzerland keeps the peace. The Harmony Hero makes the peace—and makes it sustainable.
Your Own Transformation Journey
If you’re reading this and recognizing yourself in the old version of me—the people pleaser, the utility player, the one who keeps the peace at your own expense—know that transformation is possible.
You don’t have to choose between being effective and being authentic. You don’t have to sacrifice your natural compassion to become a powerful leader. You don’t have to lose your peace to make a difference.
The path forward isn’t about becoming someone else. It’s about discovering the 5% that sets you apart and learning to lead from that place of authentic strength.
Your presence is your power. Your calm is your competitive edge. And your ability to create harmony in the midst of chaos? That’s not just a nice-to-have skill. It is exactly what our world needs from leaders like you.
The Beginning of Your New Era
So here’s my question for you: What would change if you stopped trying to keep everyone happy and started focusing on creating meaningful outcomes for everyone involved?
What would be possible if you stepped into your role as a Harmony Hero—someone who brings out the best in others without losing the best of yourself?
Your “Switzerland” moment might be waiting for you around the corner. The question is: Will you be ready to step into the new era it offers?
The world needs leaders who can navigate complexity with both strength and compassion. Leaders who can create resonance instead of just managing reactions. Leaders who understand that true power comes from presence, not position.
The world needs more Harmony Heroes. And I have a feeling you might be one of them.